Weekly wrap: Round 21 winners, losers, injuries

At around half time in the Sharks game, when I had amassed a whopping 987 and Clem was sitting on 1062, she said we should just recap our favourite movie and winter food for the readers this week… So, I went with Interstellar and Pumpkin soup and Clem couldn’t split Step Brothers, The Hangover or Anchorman, and enjoys slow cooked lamb shanks! What should we do next week?

But in all seriousness, what a bludger of a week for me and I hope plenty others! I’m not wishing for the downfall of you all, just hope someone gets in this sinking ship with me.

Nothing and I mean nothing went right for me this week. It started by benching Kotoni which I go into great detail in later in the article and culminated in me falling asleep on the lounge an hour before the Bulldogs kicked off only to wake and find Jacob Preston nowhere to be seen. I seem to have copped an AE most weeks…

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Cleary returned but didn’t set Penrith alight like we all thought. With Jack Cogger not playing reserve grade, we were kept on our toes until kickoff wondering whether he might be given an extra week. It was the most searched term behind “Manchester Weather”.

We are starting the final run home, and Round 22 will mean the last round before H2H finals for most leagues. Have you planned out your trades and byes? Because I can see some heartache coming when you need to win a final and someone is on a bye and you have $4500 in the bank and 0 trades. I horded them like a squirrel and have 10 left to make a run. I’m nowhere in any of my leagues and I’ll be starting in the carpark but at least I will have some fun on the way home!

For the Philly Hamstrings, leaving Kotoni on the sidelines hurt bigtime as I struggled to 1116 but was saved late thanks to Will Kennedy’s 111 and Captain Cleary with 162.

Clem fared a lot better finishing her round with 1202 but more importantly, scored four more points than the Spy!

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Dragons v Tigers

By Nick Moon

Come on. There had to be someone out there who watched this game in full! I mean, we had the Matilda’s kicking off their World Cup Campaign, Day 2 of the 4^th Ashes test, Cam Smith was teeing off defending his Open Championship, and Dogs Behaving Badly was showing on Channel 10! So, if you chose to watch this game I have serious questions.

It was the type of game that had little to no bearing on your weekly rise or fall… Unless you are on some dystopian planet and own Junior Tupou and Daine Laurie?!

The pair were out and out the Tigers best, scoring 139 and 108 respectively with Tupou bagging a double and 10 tackle busts! If he wasn’t in the Orange and Black then maybe just maybe he is given some consideration.

Papali’i has had a really strong three weeks, finally giving back to owners. Still no attacking stats but his work rate is up and finished Friday night with 59.

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His backrow partner Bateman too lacks attacking stats, but this is a Tigers side so it’s understandable. His 57 came from mainly tackles, as he only carted the footy up 11 times.

And Bula, if you own him still I don’t know what to say. Are you a hoarder? Do you have a pile of those Woolies magazines lying around in case you decide to ‘cook something out of it’. Sell him and move on.

Zac Lomax was the stand-out for the Red V, amassing 106 and was the only player to score over 60 for the Dragons. There aren’t too many relevant players in this side for the run home and there aren’t too many PODs I can point you in the direction of. Even buying Lomax means you own Lomax and even that just has a bad taste to it.

Minutes played – JDB 65, Bird 22, Stefano 55, IPap 80, Bateman 80

Injuries: Nil.

Judiciary: Jack de Belin (Dangerous Contact), Mat Feagai (High Tackle – Careless), John Bateman (Dangerous Contact)

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Warriors v Raiders

By Nick Moon

HOOK. IT.TO.MY.VEINS.

The New Zealand Warriors, currently the favourite team of the Rugby League Gods.

Are we starting to dream of a top 4 spot!? Imagine a prelim at Mt Smart.. Ohhhhh what scenes they would be.

But until then, we can just revel in the joy of watching SJ and the rest of these Andrew Webster coached misfits. Room on the bandwagon for one more?

Lost though it seemed in the hype of the GP win was the Supercoach output! That’s what we are here for anyway. And once the adrenaline wore off and we checked the scores, we were quickly brought back to earth.

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Only one player hit the 70s pre updates, that was CNK and he landed on exactly 70. SJ with 66, AFB 58, Tapine, 50, Harris 43, DWZ 52 and Horsburgh with 59.

It’s not panic stations by any means, it was a tough game that was built on defence from both sides but at this point in the year we would like to see something bigger from some of those more expensive players.

Wayde Egan is one though that may come in handy post the Warriors bye. Very good POD for the run home and with the absolute rubbish bin fire that is HOK, a big 100+ game isn’t far away.

Minutes played – AFB 69, Ford 82, Tohu 54, Tapine 48, Young 82, Horsburgh 70

Injuries: Marata Niukore (head knock)

Judiciary: Corey Horsburgh (Contrary Conduct)

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Rabbitohs v Broncos

By Nick Moon

Breath Nick. Just Breath.

They will ask when was the moment I went mad? And you can put it down to leaving Kotoni Staggs on my bench. Smart play to play him in the four weeks prior when he took on the Knights, Titans, Dolphins and Bulldogs. Highest score throughout those four rounds? 45. So, I thought I won’t play him up against a Bunnies side looking for a top 4 spot. Yep. 136 points on my bench. The only other time I didn’t play him was his 96 against the Sharks. How much pain can one man bring?

Clem called it last week when she said a 100+s core is just around the corner. Wish I listened.

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And lets just forget about tough draws yada yada yada… if the player is an out and out superstar *Reece Walsh* just bring them in! Despite picking up a virus at the local beauty salon and having all of last week’s lunches come up in the in goal, he was superb in his return game, finishing with 111 and the stark realisation that he is only 20. Wow. Does a backflip get you any points?

Haas banged out his usual 60 odd minutes but his work rate was down slightly, only managing 55. Will need to up that considerably to justify his high price tag to new owners.

For the Rabbitohs though it was another stark realisation that they may need to score 60 points to win the comp. Because you can’t be letting in 30+ each week and expect to win. And I don’t know if Latrell is planning on making too many tackles on his return.

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AJ bagged a try and picked up a couple LBs to get him to 82 whilst Graham too bagged a try and matched his BE. He is one I like for the remaining rounds but like a farmer on the Monaro, too many rabbits isn’t a good thing.

I wasn’t all that sold on Murray before this round, but his 76 on Friday was all base stats bar eight for a LB assist. Once Latrell returns, he could go really big. Played all bar four minutes so another tick for owners.

Minutes played – Cook 71, Kolo 80, Murray 76, Carrigan 80, Haas 61

Injuries: Nil.

Judiciary: Martin Taupau (Dangerous Contact), Jesse Arthars (Careless High Tackle)

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Titans v Roosters

By Nick Moon

I think we should take a week off from our jobs and spend it in Byron… Seems to have worked pretty well for Teddy!

He’s come back from Chris Hemsworth’s house and he played like Thor!

It was the Teddy of old as he split the Titans defence through the middle, bagging a double and setting up two others for a massive 125. Owning Teddy on Saturday was the most fun you could have had at the Gold Coast without going on the Scooby Doo rollercoaster.

Is he a POD for the run home? Our Overlord would like you to think no but his numbers are really stacking up. Three scores over 118 in his past six that also included a 89. The Chooks need to find something quickly and if they do, you can expect Teddy to be front and centre.

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Joey Manu missed out on all the fun in the opening 40 and only had a TA to show for it. Finished with 68 but even my 18-month-old daughter can see he needs to be more involved. She said “Dad, why does Trent Robinson persist with playing Joey Manu in the centres, where he is negated by not getting enough footy? Its perplexing and something that needs to be addressed by Trent and the Coaching staff!”. You said it babe!

AJ Brimson did nothing to pay back owners for last week’s no show. 42 and was made to look second rate compared to the other bloke in the 1 jersey. I’ll persist, I think I have to but just add it to the ever growing list of reasons why 2023 can get in the bin!

David Fifita getting only 62 minutes was not cool either. Still managed 54 in that time but for 840k there’s no bang for your buck. Odd decision to bring him off from whoever is running the show at the Titans now considering they got back with three tries late. I and any other non-owners are however thankful for the discounted rate we will get him at next week.

Minutes played – Fifita 61, B Smith 72, Collins 54

Injuries: Victor Radley (hamstring – pre-game)

Judiciary: Nil.

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Knights vs Storm

By Clementine Cassidy

Despite having one of the best pub crawls of my life through their hometown – journeying through the fine Newcastlean establishments dressed as Sonya Blade – I have never really got around the Knights. Until this season – because by god, you can’t help but admire this resilient bunch who are in some absolute form!

(Much like us on the pub crawl – which may have ended in naked dancing in a kitchen while the sun came up and the birds started chirping…but that’s a story for another day…)

And they say that good things take time, and it may have taken eight years. But the Knights have bloody done it!

They’ve broken their hoodoo against the Storm to come from 2 tries down to take the win 26 – 18 in front of an ecstatic home crowd, taking advantage of a Sims’ sinbinning, and piling on 3 tries in 10 minutes, including a multi-player effort to Lachlan Fitzgibbons in what is surely up there with one of the season’s best tries!

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And Ponga. Ponga on 96 points despite missing a bunch of kicks, is the greatest achievement of my SuperCoach career, because he’s the only in-form player I’ve brought in lately who I haven’t broken…yet …and you’re very welcome…

With a 5-round average of 111 points, will he join the exclusive millionaire club (current member Scotty D) and top a mil before the season ends?

And Best, Greggy M, Dom Young. Surely they form the easiest multi you will ever win this year.

Bradman Best on 82 points with a try, Marzhew on 79 points with a try, and Dom Young on 62 points with a try – and Dom Young take a bow! He has now scored SEVENTEEN tries in his last 14 games.

And Timmy Williams Phoenix Crossland on 55 points with a 55k cash rise is the gift that keeps on giving to lucky owners.

For the Storm, Munster top scored on 97 points including two try assists, a line break, and two line-break assists. He’s almost a must for one of your 5/8 spots now we’re in the pointy end of the season. I am trying my very hardest to bring him in.

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But apart from Munster, it was all Knights as far as SuperCoach points went, with Loiero the closest, with a try bringing him to 71 points.

Meany scored the opening try within minutes, but only managed a 53 so not much to report there…

And Harry Grant. Well Grant is either tons or 30s – there really is no in between, and this was a 36-point week for unlucky owners. But it’s not panic stations at all, he’s still the best option in the Hooker spot, with a 75-point 5-round average.

And Will Warbrick – 12 points. That is all. Except I really hope you didn’t play him.

Injuries: Reimis Smith (adductor)

Judiciary: Tariq Sims (High Tackle – Careless, Shoulder Charge), Harry Grant (Dangerous Contact), Adam Elliott (High Tackle – Careless)

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Cowboys vs Eels

By Clementine Cassidy

Despite losing Nanai to injury just after half-time, and Val copping a sinbinning – the Cowboys held on to secure a 24 -16 win against the Eels – their 6^th win in a row.

And Scotty D owners. OMG. You guys! You’re making the rest of us so SO thirsty!

122 points. 2 assists, a million tackle busts, 2-line breaks, 2-line break assists. Splitting the defence and scoring a try with Val in the bin. He is in SOME form!

He has a 5-round average of 123 points, and honestly. I feel like if you own him, you ARE SuperCoach. Gosh it must feel nice to be THAT hydrated!

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Val Holmes on 50 points couldn’t get it done for owners this week. Don’t panic though, because it included a sinbin so you can’t be too sad with that.

If you brought in Taulagi as a cheap way to get a piece of the Cowboys actions, you’d be a little disappointed with 36 points, but surely some points come his way…

And for the Eels, the other fullback on the field, Gutho. Owners, take a bow! 115 points 2 try assists, about 5000 offloads, a line break and a line break assist. What an absolute GET for you!

Boasting a 5-round average of 113, if you have him, you’re absolutely laughing!

And gosh, I know it was a Cowboys win, but can we just take a moment for the offloading fiesta the Eels are having, making 31 offloads in this game, including 7 from the leading offloader of the comp, Hopgood.

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And Hopgood on 63 points in 56 minutes, is just the consistent gift who keeps on giving. As an owner, I’m stoked with that!

And what a relief for owners that Mitchy Moses finished on 72 points with those 2 late tries. A lot of people (including yours truly) flipped him to Cleary last week, but if you held, the levels of elation you’d have reached with those late tries. Saved.

Okay, and I truly believe that if Dally Ms were awarded for pure season stamina, the Carty Party would 100% get it.

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They are basically having a Euro summer bender on a Contiki, the kind where you just keep going on and on and on because STAMINA, and you’ve drunk about 10,000 beers, and shotted about 50,000 shots off a bunch of randoms’ body parts somewhere in Croatia, and you’ve left your dignity somewhere in Ibiza, and in normal circumstances – you’re basically a complete inoperatable mess of a human, but you still pull up for the 3-day bender on a Greek Island somewhere, and you’re standing on top of a bar and the bartender is pouring straight vodka directly into your mouth and the whole bar is cheering for you and then you jump off the bar and go do a couple more casual body shots to add to the tally – and just like that! You’re on 73 points including TWENTY-EIGHT points in offloads.

All hail the Carty Party!

Injuries: Shaun Lane (elbow), Jeremiah Nanai (shoulder), Griffin Neame (head knock)

Judiciary: Waqa Blake (Shoulder Charge)

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Panthers vs Bulldogs

By Clementine Cassidy

Five tries in the first 30 minutes saw the Panthers take the win over the Bulldogs, 44 – 18. And while the win wasn’t unexpected, you have to give it to the Bulldogs for not lying down and keeping the try-happy Panthers to just 16 points in the second half.

And the debate for me this week was – Captain Cleary or Captain Nicho…and my heart won out in the end (of course it did, because as we all know, I am literally a girl who gets led around the SuperCoach season by her heart…).

So, I watched the game behind the couch through my fingers absolutely MANIFESTING that Cleary would NOT ton up.

And I was playing Timmy in the SC Playbook league. And it went like this:

Timmy: Captain Nicho I see?

Me: Am I…?

Timmy: You’re too loyal to him to go elsewhere (*curse my loyal heart!)

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And then I mentioned I was just on my way to charter a helicopter to make it for a pre-game wetting of Nicho’s glorious hair because my whole life goal was to beat Spy – and well Timmy! He must’ve been on some sort of elated elational high over the Peachy try, because he mentioned he was just up the road and would save me the helicopter trip and do the wetting ritual for me instead!

And so, I sent him the instructions which go like this:

This is an exact science. It has been precision tested using both mathematics and also physics by mathematical physicists throughout the ages. All steps must be followed EXACTLY.

1. Assess the wetness of the hair. Is it wet?

No: Wet the hair

Yes: Wet it some more

• Assess the weather. Is it raining?

No: Wet the hair

Yes: Wet it some more

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• Assess the need for additional wetting with VO5 Wet Look Gel. Do you think it needs it?

No: You are wrong. Give those locks a gel drenching

Yes: Drench those wet locks

• With glorious locks drenched and hair now wetter than wet, we must finish with The Dance: Backwards handspring into standing pirouette into a cartwheel to the left side once and then two to the right. Forward roly poly into standing spirit fingers. Handstand forward walkover into the circle of manifestation crystals. Chant: Wet, wet, wet, wetter than wet. Shot of whiskey.

So, did he follow my instructions?

Find out in the next recap…

…and back to the Panther’s/Bulldog’s game we go.

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And Brian To’o – 104 points including 2 tries and a million tackle busts. With a 3-round average of 75 points and at 644k…is he a go to bring in for the run home?

And Cleary was back for his 150^th NRL game, scoring 81 points with 2 try assists, a contribution, 24 points in goals, and 2-line break assists. Not quite the ton that Captainers were hoping for, but you can’t be too sad with 81 points in the first game back from injury!

Whilst Luai on 91 points with 3 try assists was nice for anybody who owns him.

And the Peach. OMG. So here I was thinking I had a chance in my SC Playbook H2H against Timmy ‘KOTD’ Williams, and along comes Tago out and Peachy in.

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And look I swear that there is a ‘Requirements of the Role’ section when people apply for the job of Panther’s centre, and that is that you must have the gluiest glue hands in the history of glue hands – and the Peach delivered on the gluiness and finished on 2 tries and 77 points.

Well played Timmy. Well played sir.

And because he plays outside the glue-hand’s centres, poor Turuva catches a cold out there on the wing, and he finished on 21 points and has now dropped under 400k.

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While Soni Luke on 25 points – well at least he made his BE.

And I don’t know which Bulldogs you’d be bringing in this late in the season when there are H2Hs to win and limited trades and overall glory to chase, but a special mention to Skelton who finished on 81 points with a try and a bunch of tackle-busts and came through for anyone who owned and played, and Kiraz who got it done with 69 points.

Injuries: Spencer Leniu (knee), Izack Tago (leg – pre-game), Jacob Preston (illness – pre-game)

On report: Tevita Pangai jnr (dangerous tackle), Corey Waddell (dangerous tackle) Liam Martin.

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Sharks vs Manly

By Clementine Cassidy

Well. This was an absolute game of two halves. What a ride! And those last 15 minutes or so – gosh they were thrilling!

24 – nil at half time. A horrific performance from the Sharks in the first half and a sparky performance from Manly…

…only for the Sharks to come back late in the second half when Manly de-sparked a bit, scoring 3 tries in 6 minutes, to almost snatch the win!

But it wasn’t to be, with Manly hanging on and claiming victory 26 – 30.

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Now, for regular readers of this article, you’ll know I copped the 22-point Reecey Walsh captaincy. So, at half time when Nicho was on 9 points – I assumed the position behind the couch gearing myself up for a repeat of that…

Especially because at half-time, Timmy revealed that he followed my instructions for the hair wetting ritual exactly – except in a moment of Cleary-did-not-ton-up spite, he used concrete instead of water for the hair drenching!

And well! Sir! How could you?

So, there you have it my fellow Nicho Captainers. The very reason that we scored a first half 9 from our Prince and all suffered heart palpitations as we crept behind the couch. I will never entrust the hair wetting ritual to anybody else, ever again!

(Admittedly, I saw a video of Timmy performing the dance and it was quite beautiful – he has excellent spirit fingers).

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And now to the points. And let us start with Nicho, who, once he managed to wash the concrete out of his hair at half time, finished on 86 points. 2 try assists and 2-line break assists.

And okay, I cannot even begin to describe the levels of elation us Nicho Captainers reached when he clicked into life in those last 15 minutes, scoring 100 points of sweet, SWEET junk…

Putting me just one point ahead of the Spy…

The dream stays alive…for now…

And Nicho boasts an average of 99 and a 5-round average of 110, and we all watched with our very own eyes how he can rack up 50 points in the space of 15 minutes – so unless you have an SJ (on the bye this week) I still believe he is the best option along with Cleary to have in your team.

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For the other Sharks the second half brought more points (for some of them). Kennedy owners would’ve been stoked with 111 points including a try and 2 assists.

Ramien on 86 points with a try was great for owners. Brailey on 36 points and Nikora on 36 points on the other hand – not so fun to own.

While Mulitalo on 54 points managed a try and an assist. Has a 3-round average of 27 points and I desperately wish he wasn’t in my team.

For Manly, we must talk about DCE. I feel like this is what he did a couple of years ago too  – came out of Origin and went on an absolute tear. Because while we were all debating Nicho vs Cleary vs SJ – he just came in and quietly did his thing – 109 points worth of thing – that’s 2 try-assists, 2 try contributions, offloads, line breaks, line break assists….

At 610k – you’d be stoked with that!

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For the other Manly players, a shout out to Ola on 72 points with a try.

Garrick on 69 points with a try just continues to get it done for owners, and Koula on 109 points crossed the line to score two.

And a massive shout out to Manly for hanging on and getting the deserved win!

Now…off I go to write a pointy-end-of-the-season rap, and plot how I can beat Spy again this week…

Until next time…

Injuries: Taniela Paseka (knee), Josh Aloiai (shoulder)

On report: Nicho Hynes (contrary conduct)